I don’t like jumping out of my comfort zone. I love staying within my nice office, holed up with a comfy sweater and my mom’s old jeans (thanks mom!) with some decaf coffee and no makeup. I don’t really like working out – it’s hard and sweaty and I feel like people are looking at me. I don’t like failing, I hate answering questions I’m not 100% sure I got correct. I hate ordering.
I’m not good at jumping into the things that make me nervous, I’m not good with spontaneous events.
But you know what? I might not be good at jumping, but I can walk.
I dyed my hair again, I dress nicer when I leave the house (and I like it a lot), and I found some lipstick that makes me feel like a spy. I might not like working out, but it’s healthy and needed, so I’ve been doing 15 minutes of stretching exercises every day and doing my best to eat healthier. I’ve been making myself order without rehearsing a million times. I’ve been trying to give myself space to be wrong and experience more unplanned events.
I think that’s what’s key. Letting yourself have room to make mistakes. Create space in your life to do things that you could fail at. Create time to work on something that you aren’t perfect at and kill the inner perfectionist.
When you can’t jump – walk. Little goals, little steps, little moments of stretching yourself.
You can’t pray well? Spend five minutes as you’re going to sleep praying, pray when you get up in the morning, let little prayers fall out of your mouth as you walk about your day. You don’t need to jump into a closet for three hours, you can walk in prayer.
Sometimes progress is walking slowly along a bridge instead of jumping across the canyon.
Sometimes progress looks a lot like failure – I only wrote 30k for NaNoWriMo but I’m more proud of those 30k than any 50k I’ve written before. So walk, my friends, if you can’t jump.